Chicken Lemone

Here's an...ahem...interestin recipe from Mrs. Betty Sanders, via friend of the blog Mrs. Gertrude Black.

On first read-through I said to myself, okay, what's so special about this? On second read-through I said out loud, "Now for heaven's sakes Betty, why the frozen lemonade? That's a rather odd choice for marinade." To which (in my imagination) Betty Draper replied, in between drags off a cigarette, "Who cares. I'm trapped in a loveless marriage under the repressive thumb of 1960's male chauvinism. You're lucky it's not marinated in Kool-Aid and whiskey."

At least the recipe name sounds French, so you can pretend you're Julia Child when tellin folks what you've made...

Ingredients:
Boneless breast of chicken (1 full breast per person - 2 pieces) (but what if I want to serve more than two people? what do I do then? I CAN'T DO MATH!)
Frozen lemonade (1 can for 4-6 servins) (this still has me shakin my head)
Grated rind of 1 lemon (fancy!)
Salt, pepper in flour for dredgin
Oil (what kind? oh who cares. I'm lucky it's not baby oil, right Bets?)

Oven temp: 350 degrees

Pan size: Who cares. Just try not to burn down the house.

How to:
Wash and pat dry chicken pieces. Place in a bowl. Lightly salt and pepper. Pour lemonade in a bowl and add to it the grated rind of lemon, stir to blend. Pour over chicken pieces. Cover and marinate for at least 8 hours. (8 hours!? why, that's like a whole day of work! what am I supposed to do, get up at the crack of dawn to make this recipe? well maybe it's just for those lucky stay-at-homers.)

To Prepare: Remove chicken from marinade and dredge with flour. Lightly brown in cookin oil (oh.) and place in a bakin pan. Cover with marinade and bake for approximately 1 hour at 350 degrees. Should come out moist, tender, and delicious. (If you say so, Betty...) Serve with rice and salad and vegetable (just one) for a delicious meal. (All right. I tried to give you the benefit of the doubt, but now I believe the lady doth say "delicious" too much...)

Mayonnaise Cake

Keepin with the tradition of puttin odd stuff into cake, Carol Schatz has a recipe that is essentially chocolate cake with mayonnaise added. I suppose that's to make it MOIST! (Schatz - the plural past tense of the verb "shit"?)

Ingredients:
2 c. flour
1 c. sugar
1 c. mayonnaise
1 c. cold water
1 tsp. vanilla
2 tsp. soda
dash of salt
3-4 tbsp. cocoa

Oven temp: 350 degrees

Pan size: 9x11 (Now that's odd. I thought the standard cake pan was 9x13. Well, I guess when you make this you need to cut off the extra 2 inches and shove them in your mouth really quick before anybody comes into the kitchen.)

How to:
Mix all above in a large mixin bowl and beat well. Pour into greased and floured pan and bake for 30-35 minutes.

Old Fashion Cookies

Bakin cookies and bars is somethin that Lutheran ladies love to do, and the Immanuel Lutheran Dorcas Society has some very special recipes for sweet tooths (sweet teeth?) in their cookbook, Generations of Good Cookin.

This recipe for Old Fashion Cookies is courtesy of Karen Freudenberg.

Ingredients:
1 1/2 c. sugar
1/2 c. oil or Crisco (go for the Crisco!)
2 eggs
1 c. sour cream
1/2 tsp. soda
2 3/4 c. flour
1/2 tsp. bakin powder
1/2 tsp. salt
1/2 c. nuts (what kind? who cares. you decide.)

(Remember, these are OLD FASHION cookies, so no fancy-pants, new-fangled ingredients here!)

Oven temp: 350 degrees OR 400 degrees - take your pick

Pan size: cookie sheet(s), ungreased (I guess...doesn't say whether to grease them or not)

How to:
Mix sugar and oil OR Crisco together until creamy; add eggs and sour cream. Stir together dry ingredients and nuts. Add to creamy mixture and mix until all dry ingredients are moistened. (MOIST!) Chill in bowl for 2 hours. Drop by teaspoon on cookie sheet. May bake at 350 degree oven for 10 to 12 minutes or 400 degree oven for 8 to 10 minutes until very light brown.