Wednesday, January 16

SPAMtastic Mincemeat Truffles

And for dessert, I present you with what could possibly be the most disgustin recipe I've encountered yet. SPAM candy. Who in God's name is responsible for this nightmare? Thanks again to Mrs. Tairy Greene for this nausea-inducing concoction...

1 envelope gelatin
2 tablespoons water
1 (12-ounce) can SPAM Lite luncheon meat (yeah, like usin the "lite" version would somehow make me less likely to vomit on bitin into one of these babies)
1 (9-ounce) box condensed mincemeat
1 cup Coffee-Mate powdered coffee creamer, preferably hazelnut
2 cups flaked coconut
½ cup black rum (well, at least it has booze in it)
1 teaspoon rum flavorin
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 pounds powdered sugar
1 cup walnut pieces
1 (24-ounce) package semi-sweet chocolate chips
1 (12-ounce) package white chocolate chips

How to:
Dissolve gelatin in water in microwave about 1 ½ minutes. In food processor combine SPAM and gelatin for 2 minutes at medium speed. Add mincemeat and coffee creamer. Process 2 minutes at medium speed.

Place SPAM mixture in large bowl. Add coconut, rum, rum flavorin, vanilla and powdered sugar. Mix well and refrigerate overnight.

Usin the large end of a melon baller, form candy into balls with a walnut piece in the center of each one. (Oh, yeah, that makes it so much better.) Freeze candy for several hours.

Melt dark chocolate chips in a small bowl in microwave for about 5 minutes. Usin a two-tined fork, dip each ball into the dark chocolate, shake off excess and place on waxed paper.
Melt white chocolate chips in microwave about 3 minutes. Place melted white chips in a Ziploc bag. Snip of a tiny bit of plastic from one corner of the bag. Drizzle white chocolate back and forth across candy balls.

Allow all chocolate to harden. Keeps in refrigerator for up to 10 days and yields 100 truffles. (Hey, I have a suggestion: Got one of those lame office food parties comin up? You should totally bring these puppies. Don't tell your coworkers what's in them, just wait for their reactions. People will eat them without knowin what they are, I assure you. I'd do it myself, but I don't have a job right now.)

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